What's your 'go-to' when things aren't working out how you thought they would? Does frustration take over?
For me, being a planner and organiser by nature, frustration is definitely my 'go-to' when things aren't working out as I'd planned.
The broken wrist
In early December I broke my wrist while renovating a room in our home. Standing on a kiddie step to sand a cornice, I stepped off awkwardly and fell. I screamed. My daughter came running and helped me get up off the floor. Immediately I started planning how I could continue the sanding. I attempted to pick up something with my left hand - but couldn't. My daughter looked at my left wrist and said, "Mum, you need to go to the hospital." I started crying, all these thoughts going through my head, the waiting at the hospital, the thought of not being able to drive and the implications on all the plans around Christmas. I could feel the frustration building.
Be Still moment
Then I took a moment to Be Still and to acknowledge God, as it says in Psalm 46:10. I asked Him what He wanted me to do in this situation, and I had a sense of a 'Slow down Wendy' message (Obviously!).
Choose to yield
At that moment I could have continued with the negative thoughts about all I wouldn't be able to do due to this injury. But over many years of having many unexpected medical situations in our family, I've learnt enough from God to know that when He speaks it is best to quickly yield, receive and embrace His words. The "just do it" and in this case it was "Slow down Wendy".
Yielding quickly
Another key God has taught me to yielding quickly is thankfulness. Look for the things to be thankful for, as it says in Thessalonians 5:18,
"Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus." Thessalonians 5:18 NIV
In the situation with the broken wrist, I was thankful that I could get up and walk - I didn't injure any other part of my body. I was grateful that I was now going to get the rest I needed - I didn't have to ask anyone's permission to stop!
Now, the cast is off, the bone has healed, and I can drive again. There are movement and strengthening exercises to do but life is back to normal. But I am so grateful that for 6 weeks I had a slower-paced life.
Frustration brings limits
And I am so grateful for all the years that God has been teaching me how to yield and not let frustration overtake me. James 1:2-4 tells us that these trials we face have a purpose,
"My brethen, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience. But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing." James 1:2-4 NKJV
God matures us through our trials. But I must say, I find it really hard to "count it all joy" when I'm feeling frustrated. The frustration seems to take all my energy, so much so that it limits my ability to think and hear clearly. I can't hear clearly from God or other people who are trying to help me process the frustration. I need a circuit breaker to stop the moments of frustration turning into hours, days, months and years!
The Circuit breaker
With each trial I go through in life, complete with its frustration, something interesting happens - my understanding of God's trustworthiness grows. My ability to go to that place of "Okay, this is frustrating and annoying, but I am going to choose to trust that God has a plan and purpose here." has increased over the years and most times I can relatively quickly yield and go to the place of trusting God. Of course, sometimes there is still that wrestle and it takes a bit longer - I am a work in progress - and thankfully God is patient and kind.
... is trust!
So my circuit breaker to being overwhelmed by frustration is - Trust! And not trusting in myself and my abilities, but trusting in God.
Proverbs 3:5-6, I'm sure you know it, says, "Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your path." (NKJV)
Trusting God with all your heart
For me, as I said, learning to trust God with all my heart is a journey. It didn't just happen like the flick of a switch when I received Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour, at age 24.
No, it has been and still is a gradual process of letting go of my plans (difficult when a lot of my career was about project planning!); letting go of the trust I have in my wisdom and knowledge (ie I know best); letting go of being led by my feelings, and letting go of the expectations of myself. Basically, it is the process of dying to oneself, and as Jesus said to His disciples,
“Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me." Luke 9:23 NIV
Surrender to His Ways
The Passion Translation says it this way,
"If you truly desire to be my disciple, you must disown your life completely, embrace my 'cross' as your own, and surrender to my ways." Luke 9:23 TPT
Surrender. Letting go of my ways and following Jesus' ways. Trusting God.
The catalyst for me to learning how to let go has been the trials of life, those trials that James talks about. With each trial that Jesus helps me overcome I learn more about His character. I grow in my understanding of just how trustworthy He is. And I learn more about my character and that my frustration at the circumstances I didn't like or want, is highlighting to me the areas where I need to trust God more.
Getting frustrated? Trust God
So next time you feel yourself getting frustrated at a situation or person, take a breath and tell yourself that this is the time to, "Trust in the LORD with all my heart, and lean not on my own understanding; In all my ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct my path."
And perhaps if you haven't already, start writing in a journal about every time you make that choice to trust God and then record what the outcome is. It will become your book of personal testimonies to remind yourself that God is trustworthy.
